January 2012
38 posts
I’m afraid of going to school tomorrow.
1 tag
Secret: In this state I’m in, I just couldn’t care less about being skinny. I want to be nothing but I don’t really care about my weight. I just don’t really care about anything. If I could choose, my days would consist of sleeping pills, cigarettes and vodka and maybe some sweets and books of my childhood.
And daydreaming but I seem to be failing at this lately.
...
I need someone to love me for what I am.
I feel so dead inside, so empty and unreal. It’s always a bit of shock to see blood pouring out of my cuts and scratches - blood is the sign you are alive. I guess I’m still alive but barely; I’m run by my most primal instincts and I watch my life passing by, disinterested. I feel like a living dead.
I live, eat, breathe but I’m not a human being. Human beings have a soul...
infinitemisfortune asked: hi darling will you check out my blog please
1 tag
December 2011
1,268 posts
I’m so fucking hungry.
I hate this.
2 tags
I was rereading the lyrics of the song that I feel describes best what I’m through, that I’ve rewritten on my typewriter when I realised I wrote what could be my suicide note. I am tempted to keep it and when I read it again, I feel … triggered to do this.
1 tag
I am not beautiful.
anonymouslydead:
Why do I always have to try to explain myself?
No one ever lets me just be upset and I feel so rude when I don’t accept your compliments, but I just can’t. I loathe absolutely everything about myself, I do. I do not want compliments because they make me just feel worse. I do understand that they come from a good place, that they mean well and I am truly grateful for them, but I...
1 tag
a story to tell.
To be honest, I want to be skinny. I want to be beautiful, to be able to wear what I want and to be happy about my body once I lose weight. I really want to look like all these girls on thinspiration blogs. I’ve always had issues with my weight and body and I was told that I am fat more than once. This started by me wanting to finally fit in - fit in clothes but most importantly, fit into...